My buddy Adam is a guy you’d probably love to hate.
He’s a self-made millionaire at 30, owns a penthouse in NYC (yes, that NYC), and lives a so seemingly perfect life; you’d wish he would spill mustard on his shirt every now and again to prove he’s still human.
At least, that’s just me.
He made his money as a real estate developer who has an uncanny ability to find and quickly put together deals. Whereas a mere mortal would agonize over the details, Adam cannonballs into his deals and makes a splash.
But oddly enough — his greatest strength of being a quick decision-maker turned out to be his greatest weakness. Currently, he’s spending about $48,000 in legal fees, regretting not reading the small print.
The scary thing about Adam is… he’s just like you.
Do you know that one thing you’re really good at? The thing that makes you feel like a superhero, capable of conquering the world.
Yeah, that thing.
Well, I’m here to tell you that your thing might just be your Achilles heel, and if you’re not careful, it will be your undoing.
And it’s because you too may be a victim of the greatest paradox that exists:
Your greatest strength is your greatest weakness.
And today, we’re going to find out why.
The Paradox of Strength and Weakness
First, let’s break down this paradox like a seasoned camper breaking down a tent.
Your greatest strength is the attribute or skill that sets you apart from the crowd.
It’s the thing you excel at, the reason you receive accolades, and what keeps you in demand in your chosen field.
But, as the saying goes, with great power comes great responsibility, and sometimes your greatest strength can be your undoing.
How?
When we lean too heavily on our strengths, we can develop blind spots that leave us vulnerable.
It’s like driving a car with a ridiculously powerful engine but no turning. Sure, you’ll go fast, but sooner or later, shit’s going to hit the fan when the road turns. And believe me… the road turns.
In other words, your greatest strength is more like a two-sided sword.
It cuts both ways.
Meaning whatever you’re really good at can also cut into you because it leaves your blind spot exposed.
To dive deeper, let’s go back to my friend Adam.
The Sword Cuts Both Ways
Adam is successful in real estate for many reasons, but especially because he moves fast — he does more deals in one month than most people do in one year.
However — sometimes, he doesn’t think things completely through. Sometimes he doesn’t notice the big details, disguised as small details — which has bitten him in the ass on more than one occasion.
From dealing with financial loss, zoning issues, and having to stomach an overflowing plate of buyer’s remorse, most of his problems could have been mitigated by showing some restraint on his greatest strength.
The sword cuts both ways.
One of my greatest strengths is my overactive imagination. Without sounding like a complete douche, (it’s probably too late), I’ve used my strength to make a career out of writing, which I’m incredibly blessed to have.
However, because I have an overactive imagination, I tend to overthink EVERYTHING, and I can’t turn my brain off. It’s very annoying and plays out in frustrating ways.
For example, if one of my friends were to innocently ask me, “What’s the worst thing that can happen?” after I decline to go out — whereas a normal person may reach the conclusion, “Yeah, you’re right.” I can come up with a Stephen King novel of worst-thing-that-can-happen-ideas that’s all too overflowing with details. And frankly, that’s not too healthy.
As I said, the sword cuts both ways.
So how can we dull the blade to stop accidentally cutting ourselves?
Good question.
Well…
You Can Fight Back by Building Up Complementary Skills
Storytime!
My friend Travis is a computer science genius who I suspect may be a robot. If you get him under the hood (casing?) of any computer, he can name every part and tell you what it does in excruciating, tedious detail. Sorry Travis, you know I love you!
He is legitimately so good with computers that he started an IT company that has taken off like The Roadrunner in a Looney Tunes cartoon.
However, for as good as he is, he lacks one key complementary skill — communication. And that’s the exact complementary skill he needs to take full advantage of his strength.
For as tech-savvy as Travis is, he SUCKS at communication. For example, he can’t really explain what he does in a way that’s easy to follow, especially to people who aren’t tech-savvy.
So when he’s on calls, helping people fix their computers — it’s usually pretty frustrating for him and his customers. They don’t understand each other, and there’s nothing more frustrating than having a problem and not understanding how to fix it.
And it’s not just Travis — we all have complementary skills we neglect.
As I mentioned, I have an overactive imagination that causes me to live in my head and not in the moment. The complementary skill I need to work on is restraint. I need to know when to turn it off.
My buddy Adam moves fast and can really benefit from practicing patience. (Or hiring someone to practice it for him.)
And you have what you have. But I’ve found that what helped me build my complementary skill the most was pretending it was a muscle at the gym.
Your New Fitness Regimen
Think of your complementary skill as that poor, neglected muscle you’ve been avoiding because it’s just too damn challenging to work out or dull. Or, let’s be real, it’s probably both.
Just as a personal trainer would have you work out the supporting muscles while rehabbing a knee injury, it’s time to show some TLC to those underdeveloped skills that complement your main strength.
Get down to business and flex those overlooked muscles. When I catch myself overthinking, I remind myself to pump the brakes and ask if it’s even necessary to dive that deep.
I work the muscle out.
For my buddy Adam, I’d recommend a checklist that makes him take it slow or even hire someone who’s all about the nitty-gritty. And that’s actually what he did.
He worked the muscle out.
And whatever you need to improve, find a way to work on it.
Be patient. It’s going to be a real pain in the ass at first. But that’s just part of the wild, chaotic adventure we call life.
C’est la vie, my friend. C’est la vie.
Striking a Balance: Embracing Your Strengths and Acknowledging Your Weaknesses
So, what’s the solution? Should you downplay your strengths and focus on your weaknesses?
Should you become maniacally crazed about improving yourself and swear off reading fiction?
Should you dye your hair red, buy a clown nose and join the circus?
Hell no.
Instead, the key is to strike a balance, embracing your strengths while acknowledging and addressing your weaknesses.
If you’re a fast decision-maker, take a step back and ask yourself if you’re considering all the relevant information and potential consequences before making a choice.
If you’re an overthinker, limit yourself on how much time is appropriate to consider a situation.
If you’re an IT wizard who can’t seem to relate to people, practice social skills and communication.
Find the balance in the force, Luke. Find the balance in the force.
It’s essential to recognize that your strengths and weaknesses are two sides of the same coin. By embracing the duality of your talents, you can become a more complete and balanced person.
And who doesn’t want that?
Your greatest strength is your greatest weakness. But with proper balance, you can help keep yourself from tipping.
Please like, comment, share and tell me what you think! Do you agree? If you found it helpful, let me know and share it with someone who you think may like it.
That is a surprisingly helpful blog post (and doesn’t even sound snarky.) I had a boss like that–she didn’t understand IT but wanted to understand it so any IT guy that had to deal with her, had to explain what he was doing, which she could not or did not want to understand or she could have just left it up to the professionals without wasting both her time and their time.
Thank you! I try to balance out the comedy with something worthwhile every now and again. And I believe that! I once consulted with an IT company and that was my point. You guys do great work but if no one can understand you, what’s the point?
I love this!! Very relatable! Especially with the over-thinking. This was very helpful. Thank you!
Oh I’m so happy you enjoyed! And yes overthinkers unite!
Guilty as charged! I’m also an over-thinker!!
Overthinkers unite!
Oh yes!
Great post Tony. I agree, we need to develop a range of skills
So happy you enjoyed! And yeah there’s always something to work on – but that’s what makes life interesting! Thanks so much for reading.
Loved this post! Building up complimentary skills will also give you more confidence in the skills you’re already good at.
Very good point! Thanks so much for reading
Really informative but yet in a funny light way.
Why thank you so much! That was what I was going for – trying to make it more fun than serious
Brilliant blog post and advice Anthony. I very much agree that your greatest strength it is the skill that sets you apart from the crowd and the one that grants you accolades, rewards and nominations. As for me I am skilled at blogging and my blog posts set me apart because I am showing my human reflections on the blog posts I write which are mostly “MENS FASHION & STYLE’ and I have been devoted to crafting interesting content since 2020 🙌🙏🎓
Thank you so much and stay at it! Play to your strengths!
Excellent
Loved it
Thank you so much for reading
Loved the Stephen King analogy! I can relate!! Great post!
So happy you enjoyed! I plan on doing more posts like these
Really loved the post; but there’s just this one thing that I am unable to achieve – striking balance – like how do we actually do it; is it really possible. Would love to know your views on it
An amazing and insightful post all in all
For me – I don’t know if I’m ever really balanced – but I can catch myself if I’m going overboard if that makes sense
It’s being self aware that helps me know when I gotta dial it back. I think balance is a finish line you tun towards but never fully meet – but with the right tools, you can correct yourself if that makes sense.
Very interesting! I’m inspired to give more thought to my weak areas!
Do if! Let me know if it helps
Ah, Anthony, my dear fellow, you’ve spun a tantalizing tale of hubris and self-awareness. How delightfully ironic that our very strengths can lead to our undoing, like a modern-day Greek tragedy. I must say, you’ve painted a vivid picture, one that reminds me of the precarious tightrope we all walk. Bravo! 👏
But, as a cunning strategist myself, I can’t help but wonder: are we not all pawns in a grand chess game, susceptible to the whims of fortune? Perhaps, my friend, the solution lies in mastering the art of deception, using our strengths to mask our weaknesses until we’ve outmaneuvered the competition. After all, isn’t business just a more civilized form of warfare? Checkmate. 😉♟️
Wow – I love this comment – checkmate indeed. That’s not a bad move at all. The counter, I think is leaning into your weakness to show you’re flawed which can make you more relatable. (Nobody loves Superman) but your comparison to a Greek tragedy is spot on. Thanks so much for reading, your comment really made me think!
Love it!
Love it! 💯
So happy you do!
Balance is very important, of course, yet achieving balance can be difficult and elusive. To achieve the right balance, however, requires that we include God as an intricate part of our lives, and to recognize, appreciate, respect, and use the gifts and talents that God has blessed us with.
I totally agree
Great post!
Thanks man! I appreciate you reading ot
This is good stuff! Thanks for posting this!
I’m so happy you enjoyed it – it was fun to write
Good snappy writing!
Aww thank you so much! I really appreciate it
Excellent article! Food for thought and action! Unfortunately! I already tried dying my hair red. Fail. 😳
Oh boy! Try and try again! Thank you so much for reading.
Good reminder about moderation. Tough to practice on our passions, but necessary. Thanks!
Moderation is everything!
I love love your writing….funny, honest, relatable….
Thanks for checking out my post!
Thanks so much!
Hey Anthony! I enjoyed this piece. It real, punchy and completely relevant for an over-thinker like me.
I’m currently setting a timer for 5 mins to decide if I should go out tonight or stay at home and catch up on work and home obligations.
Thank you so much! And that’s a great idea – I’m going to have to borrow that from you. Thanks again for reading.
As a writer, I understand what you say. Your writing style is exciting and keeps us reading. Good Job!
Thank you so much – that made my day!
Reblogged this on UNIVERSE.
Reblogged this on Allmyneeds.
This is a great post!❤
I really enjoyed the read and your writing style and expression kept me engaged in what I was reading as well as in what you were saying.
You state very good points and you are correct in your address.
This is an awesome, beneficial post that many of us can help to improve from within creating a balance within or between our strengths and weaknesses!
Have a blessed day❤
So happy you enjoyed!
😻
This reminds me of the positive intelligence work I’ve been doing. It’s a paid program, but some of the concepts are the same – figure out where your weaknesses are and build up the muscles with practice. (Hopefully this doesn’t come across as a sales pitch!) I’ve really been working on my self-awareness and ability to see myself realistically, and you’ve given me yet more to think about. (The clown reference made me laugh!)
So glad it did! Yeah shoring up your weak spots are the way to go!
Love this unique observation. It reminds me of some top lawyers showcasing their expertise for corrupt companies and tarnishing their reputations. I think we would get along very well since it’s incredible that just by asking you out, I could hear a Stephen King’s story. Ever since I decided to become a full-time writer, I’ve been overthinking my gloomy future, my parents’ disappointments, and whether I am talented or qualified enough to being a writer in this digital world. I suppose my only strength is my openness to all kinds of critiques and comments, and I never feel offended or discouraged by them. As long as my work can be seen by someone, any words from them are worth the world to me.
Forsure – I think as a writer – as long as someone reads your work and is impacted that’s all we want – do that for enough and long enough you’ll probably get paid to do it.thanks for reading
Thanks, I once worked in an accounting firm from 8 AM to 7 PM, but it’s for money and I cursed the manager while eating BBQ with the friends.
Now, I’m still working on computer from 9 to midnight, but there’s no money and I can’t have any stories to share with my office worker friends and cursing myself doesn’t make the things get better.
Fellow overthinker here (the struggle is indeed real) and very much enjoyed this article
Thank you so much -glad you do
This will help me as I have the overactive imagination which causes me to not be in the moment. Have realized this but the way you stated it is extremely helpful. Have been considering returning to amateur performing as a standup comedian which for me is the counterbalance to the isolation of writing. This is my motivation to do it so thank you for your insights.
Dude that’s awesome- good luck on the stage – remember, if you can write you can be a good comedian
Nicely written, and thanks for the Like on “Depressing Irony.” I can certainly see the similarity in what I wrote to what’s going on in your life and contents of your writing. The dichotomic elements of life and their paradoxes; interesting to write about, but they can be so incredibly chaotic without a focused lasso to wrangle them up.
How many myriad books and shows contain the ultimate moral of persistence? With good reason. Even while talent may evade us, persistence is something we can all achieve with the right amount of effort—even if that effort can be taxing to the point of exhaustion. We can stand back up when we fall. As cliché as that phrase may have become, it holds true, and we make excuses regardless.
Let’s both keep pushing forward. You’ve got this, my man—best of luck to you!
You got it too – keep grinding!
Agreed with your post.
I’m happy you did! Thank you for reading
Some reflection on your story: My best guess: If you mentioned the suit to him he would say it comes with the territory and you would say, it will give you fewer days on earth to enjoy your good fortune.
Yes indeed – thank you for reading!
I have the same problem of spending too much time thinking and introspecting. I used to think it’s what helps me make sense of the world, that I should let it play out and not let a thought fester in there, even when my friends and family would say to give it a rest (cos they saw my struggle).
It hasn’t been helping and I think there’s something to learn from all the pasts we read about, I actively guide my thought in a different direction now sometimes.
It feels forced and the unfinished thought comes back later, but atleast I can entertain them at a time I’m better equipped to deal with it. Thanks for sharing. I love your work.
You got me! I also am an overthinker. Probably the damnation of every writer. But I am trying, believe me, I’m trying.
You’re in good company
Thanks for liking my post “Write On” – appreciate it. This here is a fantastic read and interesting food for thought. Suppose step one is to figure out what your greatest strength is — or perhaps you could work the other way and begin with your greatest weakness. Fellow over-thinker here (mine manifests in the form of generalized anxiety disorder — fun!). Anyway, you’ve sent my mind chewing on this. Thanks!
SO happy you enjoyed! You’ll figure it out – we all do – overthinking is a strength – we’re good strategist – we just got to know when to turn it off, and focus more on executing what we know we want to do
Apologies if this is a duplicate comment (my first one seems to have not submitted). Thank you for liking my post “Write On” – appreciate it. This here is an excellent read and interesting food for thought. Suppose the first step is to identify your greatest strength — or perhaps you can work the other way from your greatest weakness. Fellow over-thinker here (which manifests for me as generalized anxiety disorder – fun!). Anyway, you’ve sent my mind chewing on this. Thanks!
You have given me food for thought. Enjoyed reading your writing. Thanks for sharing.
Enjoyed your writting and the punches of humour. Here’s to the blinkered and the thought beaters! Love this reminder of human nature, and the consequences.” My tendency resides in the camp of over-thinkers. My mantra has become Dallas Willard’s quote, Suppose our failures occur, not in spite of what we are doing, but precisely becasue of it.” I then state – Move one, Nellie. Forward is better than backward! Cheers.
Makes a lot of sense. At one point in reading my head conjured up that old adage, “You have two ears and one mouth — use them in that proportion.”..
It fits the narrative! We gotta listen before we speak!
i really do agree that strengths and weaknesses go hand in hand. i loved the angle on complementary skills! sometimes, something tangential has to buffer knowledge workflows in order to see degrees and nuances in fast moving situations!
thanks for the visit! – Mike
So happy you enjoyed – thanks for reading ! It’s all about the nuance
I feel like I have been to therapy! So helpful. I will be coming back to reread this on a less busy day. Also, I laughed twice, especially the bit about mustard on his shirt. Sounded like something my mother would have said! Thanks.
Thank you so much for reading and commenting -glad you enjoyed
THIS: “because I have an overactive imagination, I tend to overthink EVERYTHING”