Curveball.
I, the honest satirical writer, had a care-bear moment.
For those that know me well, you’d know that I really do have a soft spot for homeless people.
Particularly the ones that are homeless largely because of their addiction.
Today at work I couldn’t help but be entranced by the outside world; I saw things for how they are. (Doesn’t that sound Star Wars esq?)
So I wrote poem.
Yes, I wrote a poem.
For context this poem is about the homeless person I saw today who was piss drunk.
Be sure to give it a read, tell me how much it sucks or whatever you kids do on the interweb – but most importantly let me know what you think.
Thanks,
-ATRW
I see hope drowning in beer cans; the smile in your pain.
As time passes, the comfort of yesterday washes away like rain,
And the streets, yes the streets they are your chains,
All you live for is one buzzed trip down memory lane,
You drank away your name,
You drank away your name,
What a shame,
What a shame.
It reads like you believe all homeless people became drunks and their current end-all is pretty much their fault.Or that the subject of this poem became a drunk and that’s how their end-all came to be. This is not to say you think this, this is to say, this is how the poem reads to me.
The lines I love especially are:
“As time passes, the comfort of yesterday washes away like rain,
And the streets, yes the streets they are your chains,”
At least you were moved to write something about the situation (s) you witness. Peace, Tony and thanks for sharing.
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Thank you so much for the feedback! So this was about one particular person who was piss drunk.
I’m so happy you stopped by, thanks for giving it a read!
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Ahh, I see. That view is always a disturbing one an often crushes me more-so than others. You’re so welcome. It is my pleasure.
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He said ‘particularly the ones who are homeless largely because of their addiction.’ To me that doesn’t equate to the blogger thinking all homeless people are alcoholics or drug addicts.
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I appreciate giving hope to others. I sensed from your poem that the drunk did nothing to help and that saddened me.
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Thank you so much for stopping by – you’re not far off from the truth!
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Well captured! Although, I love the piece as a whole, the phrase “the smile in your pain,” is the one that strikes me. A very profound piece. Linda
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Reblogged this on Ancien Hippie.
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Thank you for a great blog
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My pleasure! Thank you for always reblogging.
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Love it! Simple yet effective….you drank away your name..
Good stuff.
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Thanks Matt I appreciate you stopping by!
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Good poem…
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Many years ago, at the age of nine, I was sitting in church listening to the vicar when I said to myself,”What I am being taught here is flawed; I must go and find out the reality but must do so on my own so that I get the purest information I can.
Fifty four years later I wrote down all I had learned to date and have added to it since then. The flow of information is a tiny trickle. The website of this information is on my WP profile and I duplicate it here
https://sites.google.com/site/themilkiswhitethebook/home
To all who read this I say, “Apiekai”.
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Thanks for the link – I’ll check it out!
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The first two verses are just deep, shows the depth of how you felt.
Like above, I also liked this line, “As time passes, the comfort of yesterday washes away like rain”
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Tony, my brother! This is so true. You know why? Because who you are talking about could be any of us. Yes, because nobody’s safe in this world, it all depends on us.
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Thanks for stopping by my dude! I love your perspective on this – you’re right!
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Sad but look at it this way depends on the drink and it’s purpose
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Well done, and so sad. I think there are tragic tales behind the lives of the homeless and most will never be heard.
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Would love to see a poem dedicated to the hope for the homeless (assuming you do have hope for the) 🙂 Great stuff!!
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Thank you.. I’ll have to see what I can do
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Looking forward to it!
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Thanks for stopping my site today and thought I’d do the same. I was pleasantly surprised and glad I did. I enjoyed your sensitivity regarding the homeless issue. It’s bothered me before, too. If I’m able to give them food at the time, I will. But to encourage their habit, I do not contribute to that. It IS a trap, lost their soul & ‘drank away their name’ to boot.
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Thanks for stopping by Mary! I do the same thing – I give food when I can.
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Very beautifully said. Thank you for caring.
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Thank you good sir! I can’t help but to care
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Reblogged this on Still Another Writer's Blog.
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https://robertsvisiom.wordpress.com
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I like this poem. On an added note, I think people believe that homelessness is an epidemic because people are addicts. But I think in a lot of cases, first comes some sort of mental illness, then comes self-medicating in the form of addiction, followed by homelessness. I have a lot of empathy for those without a home. Thank you for your poem that promotes more awareness of this issue. It was beautiful.
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Thanks so much for the feedback!! I’m glad we both share the same soft soot
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I stumbled across this in my early morning wanderings. I appreciate your creativity and artistry, but having worked as support staff at a temporary “last-resort” homeless shelter this past season (180 days due to city permit), I struggled with this one. After you spend among time among these beautiful people and get to know their stories, their lives, their struggles, things that may have brought on their “choices”, the hopes and dreams they once had, and may still have….it changes everything. Peace out. – C
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Thank you Cindy!!
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I liked this poem a lot. It’s sad how homeless people are often ignored and stigmatized in our society.
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I think it’s beautiful, it’s sad but may be true for a lot of people to be honest but leaves room for hope, just a reminder that you are someone, you do have a name; a special one, so don’t drink it away
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I think it’s beautiful, it’s sad but may be true for a lot of people to be honest but leaves room for hope, just a reminder that you are someone, you do have a name; a special one, so don’t drink it away
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As a poem should, yours says much in few words. Nice work.
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Thank you!!
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Nice poem, the only thing I would change is the last four lines.
‘You drank away your name, you drank away your name, what a shame, what a shame.’ I just think there’s a more innovative way you could have ended it.
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Thanks for giving it a read! That’s great food for thought
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No problem 🙂
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