1. A dog is stupidly excited about a new toy. A cat is stupidly excited about the box the toy came in.
2. A dog is man’s best friend. A cat is man’s bitchy friend. Heavens know we need both.
3. A dog wants to be seduced. A cat is the seducer.
4. A dog will check to see if you’re OK. A cat will check to see if you’re giving it a treat… eventually.
5. The dog thinks you’re the hero every time you bring her food. The cat thinks it’s the hero, and you’re the i̶d̶i̶o̶t̶, server who feeds them.
6. A dog will bark at the mailman. A cat will tell the mailman to email him, making him feel a little bad on the inside.
7. A dog will run and chase after a ball. A cat will watch you throw the ball and judge you for the futility of human recreation.
8. A dog will beg for table scraps. A cat will have you begging for attention.
9. A dog is a good boy. The high and mighty cat cannot be persuaded by such feeble attempts at flattery.
10. A dog will protect the house from intruders. A cat will rub up against the intruders’ legs.
11. A dog plays checkers. A cat plays chess.
12. A dog will shower you with unconditional love. A cat will have you longing for love.
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Wonderful! The exact post-Christmas belly laugh I needed. Thank you!!
Hahah so happy you enjoyed!
My distinct pleasure.
Nice, Tony, my man, nice.
Thanks so much for reading it!
Ha! Cats are such lovely creatures.
Totally agree!
Excellent Anthony 👍
A dog works for a living (guide dogs, police dogs and more), showing a valuable utility to civil service, appreciated by everybody.
A cat could in theory do anything, being the secret superhero among animals, but strangely enough chooses to do NOTHING. You have to admire the sheer chutzpah of this choice.
Hahah I admire it my friend! Thanks for reading
Love the distinctions between cats and dogs. Definitely my experience!
Thank you so much for reading
A dog sees their owner and thinks, “This person shelters me, feeds me, and cares for all my needs. They must be God.” A cat sees their owner and thinks, “This person shelters me, feeds me, and cares for all my needs. I must be God.”
Hahaha classic cat move
I’m going to guess you have at least one dog and at least one cat. So much truth in what you wrote.
Hahah so I grew up with dogs – I love them, but now I have two cats. As I get settled in, i want another dog
Too true! Mittens was the exception. He had the best attributes of a cat with the heart of a dog. 🙂
all true
This is so funny! 😂
I used to be dog person but now I’m slowly changing into a both-person.
Welcome to the good side! Both is the way to go
“A dog is man’s best friend. A cat is man’s bitchy friend. Heavens know we need both. ”
The last sentence here is packed with all the emotions !
Hahaha straight from my own feelings
Good thoughts!
A dog appreciates everything. A cat is more ‘discerning’ or to put it another way – ungrateful. e.g. having discovered an exotic delicious cat food which they clearly enjoy, devouring it greedily, you immediately order six months supply to discover that they are suddenly no longer interested. . . .
Discerning is the key word hahah
True