My fingers hovered over the post button… then retreated.
There I was on social media, moments away from posting my first writing-related YouTube video.
Except… that’s not completely true.
I was in my room, thinking about posting my first video, when doubt extended a hand.
The truth is, with my book coming out, I’m trying to think of all the ways to get the word out. And lately, I’ve noticed one thing—whenever I go on social media, I don’t look at pictures anymore… I watch videos… and when you see a pattern, you can’t unsee it.
So it’s something that’s been on my mind.
So much so that I actually started posting videos on TikTok.
But YouTube…
That seemed like the new horizon.
Post on YouTube and, well, maybe you can get one of those shiny plaques.
I turned over in bed.
“But what if no one watches?”
“What if I do this and I just waste my time?”
So I did what any first-rate time-waster does.
I went back on social media and made Zuckerberg some money.
That’s when I found a golden nugget of mindset advice.
It came from this folksy girl whose music I liked, who was being interviewed about her success.
She said, “There’s a million ways to fail, but being worried about being embarrassed is the dumbest excuse.”
It made me stop.
She went on to say, “I knew what I wanted to do was make music for a living, so if being embarrassed for a little while is the price to pay to get the word out, I’m doing it.”
And I love that reminder.
Because it’s so true.
Embarrassment is the dumbest way to fail at something.
Because embarrassment… embarrassment is a human emotion.
The only way to never feel embarrassed is to get a lobotomy.
And you and I don’t want to get a lobotomy.
As a friendly reminder about embarrassment:
One, you can’t control what other people think… and if you could, you probably wouldn’t like yourself.
Two, you should only care about what you think… you’re the only person who’s qualified to live your life.
And three—people have a shockingly short memory.
Remember a few years ago when everyone was dumping water on their heads?
The Ice Bucket Challenge?
You couldn’t open social media without seeing it.
Now fast forward to today.
Was that the first time you thought about it this year?
Exactly.
People forget.
It was a memorable quote that got me off my ass. But upon reflecting, I’d like to add one more.
Worrying about being embarrassed is the dumbest excuse… but a close second is laziness.
Because if you have a dream and you’re unwilling to work toward it, then maybe you don’t want it as much as you think you do.
Which sounds harsh.
And it probably is harsh.
But I’ve gotten to the point in my own life where I’m trying to accept this:
If I’m completely happy, I can just chill.
But if I’m not completely happy, and I have a dream, then I have no excuse not to put some effort into it most days of the week.
Because it’s nature.
There’s no version of reality where you get meaningful results without friction.
You don’t plant a corn seed and wake up to a stalk.
But also—and this is important—you shouldn’t optimize your way out of a life you actually enjoy.
You’re allowed to rest.
You’re allowed to do nothing sometimes.
You’re even allowed to waste time. Honestly, it keeps you human.
But…
There’s a difference between resting and avoiding.
One restores you.
The other slowly shrinks your life.
So yeah—put yourself out there.
Of course it’s going to feel weird at first. It’s supposed to.
You’re going to cringe at your own voice.
You’re going to think you’re being awkward.
You’re going to assume people are watching more closely than they are.
They’re not.
They’re busy.
They’re distracted.
They’re living their own lives.
Which is good.
It means it’s easier to start.
Please like, comment, share and tell me what you think! Do you agree? Let me know below.
My book is coming out this month, I would love your support!
Follow me on SUbstack here: (1) Tonysbologna | Anthony Robert | Substack
Ya gotta hustle.
Gotta hustle! Appreciate you reading my friend!
Great post, yup I wonder if I’m the king of avoidance, I always do it in the end, so I wonder what it’s all about. I started posting on TikTok recently, (inundated with DMs offering to make me millions 😂) I had the same quandary over YouTube but decided to give it a go. To be honest I just stick the same content on there 😂 It’s trying to work out which ones actually work the best that annoys me. They say videos are best for YouTube but a picture post I put up has the most views 😂
It’s so wild man! I’m seeing the same things.
Well hey – you sound a lot like me, we avoid it but we get to it.
Cheers my friend!
That balance between working towards your dream and preserving your soul/center/inner calm can be tricky, but your reminder is timely and well-put! Thanks, Tony!
Tricky indeed! So appreciate you reading!!
As I reminded myself the other day, a journey of a thousand steps begins with losing your car keys…
So good, just inspired me, thank you
Success can be elusive, particularly in creative endeavors like book writing and publishing. Congrats on your journey to getting your book out there.
I had a healthy fear when I got started, Tony. Fifteen books in I’ve been on most social media platforms, including TikTok but not YouTube, made videos and posted all sorts without embarrassment: I got over it. PS, I’ve never encountered the ice bucket challenge, which sounds like it can only be a good thing. Best of luck with your endeavours, and keep up the great posts. 🙂
Thank you so much my friend! And 15 books is the coolest thing ever! Yeah didn’t miss much with the ice bucket challenge. But it was everywhere for like 3 months in the states
Great article! really loved it. check out my blog if you’re interested in short stories, poetry, and creative personal essays – lucazani.xyz
great piece! I’d love for you to check out my latest story, and let me know your thoughts!
I’d be happy too!
please do! would love to know your thoughts.
Post the link here, for some reason your page won’t load for me
sure! it’s https://lucazani.xyz/2026/06/11/003-amateur-intermezzo/
Just left a comment but here it is as well: I thought that was beautiful- very immersive / reminded me of driving home and blasting songs. Good writing!
“The only way to never feel embarrassed is to get a lobotomy.” I need to hang this up above my work area! Love this!!!
Dream & Effort goes hand-in-hand, but, yes, effort demands will power to overcome all hindrances. Liked reading your article.
A candid and relatable reflection on hesitation, especially that quiet moment right before sharing something new. It captures the tension between wanting to be seen and fearing judgment, then gently pushes toward action without pretending the fear isn’t real.
The strongest thread is the distinction between rest and avoidance: one restores you, the other quietly narrows your world.
So glad you enjoyed!!
Yes to all of this, especially people having short memories. That is a wonderful, liberating truth. 🙂
You’re right, Anthony, you just have to do it! Have fun!✨
Thank you so much my friend! And you thank you so much for all your help with letters from Jasper! That’s something I will never forget!
You’re so very welcome! I can’t wait to read the finished book.😊
Can’t wait for you to read it! – going through the proof now
Recently, when I posted my first post here on wordpress, I realized that finally I discovered a place where is a lot of people, and they are real… I mean, REAL like old internet that I remember, when you could get long comments, dive into real discussions, wow.
And now I read your stuff here, and I checked your profile, you releasing a book, real book! Congratulations and at least, about that post, it’s real (probably I overused that word) gold what you wrote here.
Thank you so much! I love it here m! Other social media is so impersonal … soooooo impersonal. It feels performative to me. This feels like fun
Thank you so very very much!!
Oh this is nice ! Amazing that you went on YouTube – I try it out again. I am Upload the funniest song I did on my blog !
Do it!
Thanks for the reminder! I will keep writing. Of course I want people to like what I write and subscribe, but I cant forget why I do it – I absolutely love writing 😀
Started how to’s on social so many times then backed out. Typing it out is just easier to me than being in front of a camera
I get that, I’ve felt this way myself many times!
I’ve been writing for a while, but I am far from successful. I need to be more bold. It’s easy to write. The selling part is hard. Thank you for your post. Thinking…
Good luck – if it makes you feel any better – I would describe myself as an introvert. What comforts me is no one is thinking about me – so even if I put myself out here, worst case, people will forget and go back to their life
There’s a million ways to fail, but being worried about being embarrassed is the dumbest excuse….my take away.Because we mostly limit ourselves because of shame and what people will say, very dump and we need such pieces to remind us
This makes sense! I recently did a podcast interview for the first time and was super worried about how I sounded. I listened back to it today and it was actually fine. As a listener, it was interesting. Most people aren’t analyzing everything they hear from strangers with a fine-tooth comb.
That’s amazing! Send the link! I did the same thing with my interview. But I think underneath it all, it just means we care.