Humor

Stupid Phrases

You know the moment when you hear a stupid phrase and your eyes cringe?

Below are the words that cause these moments.

Enjoy.

“It’s neither here nor there”

Track with me… so if it’s not here, and it’s not there, then where the fuck is it? Because I can’t find it and it’s really freaking me the fuck out. Like what are we talking about a ghost? A black hole? The wind? If it’s neither here nor there, then this is quite the puzzle and I’m sitting here typing without a piece.

“It is what it is”

Or is it…. *Que mystery music*

“We agree to disagree”

Can’t we just disagree? You know, you can’t have your cake and eat it too you selfish bastard. Stop dodging the draft and disagree. Chest out disagree. Confidently disagree. Just disagree with me, it’s easier that way.

“That being said”

That being said, you just completely wasted my time because you know, you just said it. I was there, you may not remember it, but I was there. I heard you say it. I looked at you when you said it. I felt it when you said it. That being said, stop saying this.

“I wanted to let you know”

Hey, I wanted to let you know, that you are letting me know. Ok. Thanks.

Please like, share, comment and tell me what you think. What stupid phrase is your favorite? What phrase am I missing?

116 thoughts on “Stupid Phrases”

    3. That phrase bothers my dad so much. People don’t use it around him anymore because he asks follow-up questions: “Who made this box? How did I end up in the box, in your opinion? Why is it a box? Why can’t it be a jar or a bowl or some other thing?”
      It’s been an effective method for him to stop hearing that phrase, without any jamming of pencils in the ears. 😊

      Liked by 2 people

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  15. I happen to like “agree to disagree”.

    But I absolutely despise:
    Live. Love. Laugh.
    (perhaps because all I can picture is 30-something women tryna be 21 drinking wine and thinking that’s sexy with their eternal duck-lips)
    and
    Keep Calm and ___ (fill in blank with some stupid shit. Doesn’t matter WHAT it is, it’s stupid. And overused. And doesn’t mean anything.)

    Liked by 2 people

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  18. I enjoy your posts. They’re short. So my least favourite saying these days is : “To make a long story short…”
    Well, I’ve noticed that, IT NEVER IS.
    😉

    Liked by 4 people

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    1. The most interesting phrase?! That’s pretty hard, it’s one of those things I’ll have to hear then recite, – phrases I like “it was written, legend has it, I’ll be damned” things like that I enjoy.

      Liked by 2 people

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      1. I happen to have a tattoos of these (?!) haha! Cool. Thank you for your response. I’ll be checking in on more of your posts. There’s something very personable and enticing about this first piece of yours that I’ve read. I look forward to more.

        Liked by 2 people

  31. Hey Tony,
    How about “You’re a good man, Charlie Brown.” I mean I’m not even close to being Charlie Brown. Or, Elmer Fudd (the most useless cartoon character I’ve seen), “Be very, very quiet…I’m hunting wabbit.”

    Your blog is cool and you speak straight from the gut. No false pretenses. Are you a good man? Only you can answer that.

    Hey Tony, what a day for being near the water, eh? Enjoy your day sir!!!

    Liked by 3 people

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    1. Thanks so much John!

      Yes, Elmer Fudd is a pretty useless cartoon character. I’m sure his brain is filled with mashed potatoes, twigs and G.I. Joes.

      Thanks for stopping by my blog and thank you for your service!

      Liked by 1 person

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      1. Hey Tony, you are very welcome, brother. We agreed, this makes me happy. Elmer Fudd, tsk, tsk. Oh well, yeah, your blog is cool and I have to thank you for following me. I hope you keep up with my stuff and I’ll keep up with your b log. Best wishes man. Take good care.

        Liked by 1 person

  32. Tony – thank you for liking my latest post. That brought me here and I found this delightful post. I’m eternally grateful; taking the scenic route, because what will be will be – I suppose it’s inevitable so strap yourself in.

    Liked by 2 people

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    2. The reason you hear it all the time is because it is correct.

      “I couldn’t care less.” is a FULL statement, but “I could care less.” is usually intended as an ABBREVIATION for “If you think I could care less, you are greatly mistaken.” and is therefore – since the hearer has to fill in the blanks (much like having to carry the cross that you will be crucified on) – a much stronger rejection, much like the difference in strength between “No.” and “Hell no.” Remember that a great percentage of discourse is adversarial in nature, or is at least tinged with an adversarial nature. “I couldn’t care less.” is a neutral factual statement that you make to a friend in private. “I could care less.” is the same idea packaged for a punch against an adversary. Brevity is the soul of wit, and wit does not mean merely a shared laugh with friends, but also the winning whirl in those encounters where no quarter is asked, and none is given.

      Liked by 1 person

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  35. Hey pussyfooting around the issue is an art I’m still trying to learn Good Sir. That being said, I completely understand agreeing to disagree. Is for the other party, not for me. It’s being ingratiating and condescending at the same time. Wherever you lean.

    But I’d rather just disagree.

    -Neru

    Liked by 1 person

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  41. Probably not in the same vein as the phrases you are on about but I often find myself saying: “..old Roman roads..” at the same time thinking to myself: ‘Of course they are old, you twat! When did the Romans last build any new roads?’

    Liked by 1 person

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  45. Not a phrase, but a word: literally.

    It is literally being used to describe figurative things, or hyperbole. “I am literally dying right now.” No, you’re not. You are “literally” talking to me right now, not dying. But literally is used all the time these days, and it’s used to describe things that are not literal.
    Then again, this might be a pet peeve of mine. 😂

    Liked by 1 person

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  46. Love this!

    I have some phrases too, for instance I don’t like when people say, “I have a bone to pick with you.” Or “on the whole” .

    And Caslee 2000, that literally thing really has me going too. Like when people post a picture of a baby or an animal doing something and add, ” this is me now literally”.

    Tony thanks for stopping by my blog. I really enjoyed reading this post an, that being said, I just wanted to let you know, I will go on to reading more from this point on.

    Liked by 1 person

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  47. Pingback: Stupid Phrases Part 2 – tonysbologna : Honest. Satirical. Observations.

  48. LMAO, too. I hate “it is what it is.” I always want to say, “what if it is what it isn’t?” or “what if it isn’t what it is?” Or “what if it isn’t what it isn’t?” I also hate, “give me a break.” Okay. What would you like me to break? Arm? Leg? Neck? Thanks for the chuckles, Tony.

    Liked by 1 person

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