Humor

Target Is Becoming Walmart And I’m Scared.

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Bold Claim.

We are in the end times, and I have the proof you need.

If you thought I was referring to the imminent threat of WW3 because world leaders are juggling nukes like underwear juggles balls…. you’d be wrong.

And if you thought it was the Covid case count rising and falling like the chest of a sleeping giant… you’d also be wrong. (but have a great imagination 😉)

No, the proof I needed was more local.

More specific.

More random.

You know how I’m certain we’re really in the end times.

Target is becoming Walmart.

Specifically, the Target shoe aisle… or what’s left of it.

May I ask, what in the glorious, everlasting fuck is going on there?

I mean Target did have… a target on its back but come on…

The irony is too rich.

For those wondering what? As in what-the-fuck-am-I-talking-about, take a look at your local Target and see what’s left of it.

Mark my satirical words:

The target shoe aisle should be renamed the tornado aisle.

It’s a disaster.

Boxes are misplaced, shoelaces knotted, and a real live chicken is squawking in a size 6.5 shoe box.

Seriously, who let the farm into Target?

What kind of monster puts on a shoe and is like, “Oh this doesn’t fit. Let me put some mustard on it and backhand throw it to who the fuck cares!“

That’s the type of ratchet shit that’s on its way.

Why?

Because Target is becoming Walmart.

And I’m scared.

I don’t know what the world needs, but I know we don’t need more Walmarts.

And Target, that’s the path you’re on.

But I’m here to warn you.

The moment is now to change the course of asinine shopping forever.

Restore Target from a Walmart experience to what it was born to be: An overpriced experience.

I’ll be there waiting in line holding a cup of Starbucks like a sap when that day comes.

I’m rooting for you.

– Some guy who was mildly inconvenienced.

P.S. Please like, comment, share, and tell me what you think. Is Target becoming Walmart? Let me know.

41 thoughts on “Target Is Becoming Walmart And I’m Scared.”

  3. I shop at Target here because the other general-merchandise chains, including department stores, have been killed off and Walmart isn’t in the area. Target’s merchandise is about as low-quality as you can go, and there are no store clerks anymore to help. They do keep prices low, however; but I buy online instead. And nothing at Target seems to have been made in America – isn’t that sad?

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  4. Haha. I thought you were going to talk about how they have all those registers, but will only have about four open at a time, like Wal-Mart. Lol!

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    1. Our Target has many registers, on two floors, but only one register at any one time (at most!) has a real-life human being – there are several others open, but they’re all attended by computer terminals. My main problem with computerized checkout is that each store chain’s systems work differently (and frequently update & change), and I have to figure out how the hell to work them each new store I go into. Screw it; I’ll wait for people. People, if you ask the same question twice, you might actually get a different answer the second time – hopefully, one you can use. Terence Kuch terencekuch@gmail.com OK to share this message

      On Wed, Apr 27, 2022 at 7:27 PM tonysbologna : Honest. Satirical.

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  5. Target spent millions to break into the Canadian market & flopped – turns out Canadian shoppers weren’t sophisticated enough to recognize the superior quality of Target merchandise. Walmart’s biggest rival now is Dollarama lol

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  7. I haven’t been in a Target store since the pandemic began in March 2020 … guess maybe I’ll have to go see for myself soon, but if it’s as you say, if it’s becoming like Wally World, then I won’t be going back! I haven’t been to Wally World for … oh gosh, I know at least 10 years, probably longer!

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    1. Go at your own risk! haha no I actually like Target- the one time I went it was kind of wild, but I hope it’s not the new norm. I’m giving them the benefit of the doubt/.

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      1. I’m guessing the pandemic has turned many things topsy-turvy, but I’m hoping things will settle at some point! I like Target, too … I’ll try to check it out soon! I got brave last week, donned my mask and went to my very favourite place, Barnes & Noble, but was somewhat disappointed. No more cozy seating areas, about half the number of books they used to have, and areas mismarked, plus none of the old familiar staff. Ah well … I still enjoyed it.

  8. Was just in my neighborhood Target a few weeks ago…fairly clean, well stocked store. Spent 20 minutes wandering around looking for the shoe dept, and when I found it I just stood on the main aisle, afraid to take another step. It was exactly like you described…don’t know WTF blew through there but I wasn’t going in. Boxes and shoes thrown everywhere, a misc shoe here and there on the shelf. Kept walking, got my Starbucks and left. At least my shoes didn’t stick to the floor like Walmart, which I haven’t been in many, many years.

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  13. In one post I fallen madly in love with you! I, too, have a saddening Target decline story, but it has a happier ending…so far. It has to do with the discovery that not all Target’s are created equal, even when they are only a few miles apart. Why do these Target stores suffer so badly? I know not. But they really should know that if one Target (insert expletive) it makes me think they ALL do and I become hesitant to rely on another.

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