Life

The Real Reason You Haven’t Hit Your Goals Yet

“You gotta put your heart into it.”

The line reached up and slapped me across the face.

I was  at home, slumped on the couch, half-reading some book on success, when a single line shook my spirit:

You gotta put your heart into it.

And I just… stopped.

For a few seconds, my brain spun.

Not in a bad way. But in a wait a damn minute kind of way.

I set the book down and started reviewing my life like it was a Netflix documentary. My mind raced to:

  • My jobs.

  • My hobbies.

  • My relationships.

  • My goals.

  • My regrets.

And then an uncomfortable truth sprouted up like a weed in a field of flowers:

Sometimes—I didn’t.

Sometimes I gave the bare minimum and hoped for the maximum return.

Sometimes I coasted and called it “patience.”

Sometimes I convinced myself I was stuck when really, I was just scared to commit.

I tried to get back into the book, but my brain had one thought on repeat:

If you want success, you’ve gotta be two feet in.

Success Demands Emotional Buy-In

Here’s the thing nobody tells you:

Effort without emotional investment is just busywork.

We love pretending success is some mysterious equation—equal parts hustle, luck, and maybe a crystal or two.

But the uncomfortable truth is, the stuff that really matters—the big, life-changing stuff—requires your heart.

Not your Instagram version of passion.
Not your “I’ll do it after I scroll TikTok” energy.
Your actual, messy, vulnerable, risk-taking heart.

Half-Committing is a Trap

Before I launched my copywriting business, I spent an embarrassing number of hours mentally pacing.

Not planning.
Not strategizing.
Just… doubting.

Can I do this?
Do I know enough?
Will this work for me?
What if I fail? I can’t fail, I’m a good writer, right?

Looking back, I shake my head.
Because wondering if you can do something is a waste of time.
Of course I could start a copywriting business. People do it every day.

The question I should have been asking was:

“How seriously am I willing to take this?”
“Am I ready to go all in?”

Because the answer to that question is what ultimately dictates success.

And it’s not just about starting your business; it’s the same for everything you do.

Can you learn Spanish?

Sure.

Can you learn it quickly and actually remember it? Yes, if you go all in.

Can you lose 20 lbs?

Of course. You’ve seen hundreds of people do it. 

But losing 20 lbs and keeping it off… that requires going all in. 

The truth is, anyone can damn near do anything.

But those who succeed and stay successful have mastered the emotional game.

Your Heart Is the Variable

Here’s what most people miss:
Success in anything is rarely just a knowledge gap.

Sure, knowing what you’re doing helps.
Following proven frameworks? Highly recommended. It will greatly accelerate your speed to success. 
But the truth is, most people already know what to do.

Hell, you can YouTube your way to a law degree these days.

You see, the real barrier isn’t just knowledge.

It’s an emotional commitment.

Because when you go all in, things shift.
Your standards rise.
Your energy sharpens.
You stop tolerating excuses, especially your own.

Will it guarantee success?

No, life isn’t a Disney movie.

But it will guarantee momentum.

It will guarantee growth.

And it will guarantee you’re giving yourself your best shot. 

Real-Life Proof

Don’t believe me? Cool. Let’s look at the receipts:

  • Sarah Blakely started Spanx with $5,000 in savings and zero fashion experience. She was selling fax machines door-to-door. But she believed in her idea—and went all in. She cold-called manufacturers, cut the feet off pantyhose, and hustled her way into Oprah’s list. Spanx became a billion-dollar company. That’s not luck. That’s heart with a side of hustle.

  • Steve Harvey lived out of his car for three years while pursuing stand-up. He bombed. He doubted. He nearly quit. But he kept showing up. That’s not just persistence—that’s emotional investment when everything else says “quit.” Now he’s got books, shows, suits, a damn empire. That’s heart.

  • Viola Davis grew up in poverty, stealing food to survive—and now she’s an EGOT winner. Acting wasn’t a hobby. It was a lifeline. She studied her craft like her future depended on it. Because it did. She didn’t “dip a toe”—she dove into the deep end. That’s the kind of commitment success demands.

  • Matthew McConaughey turned down $14 million for another romantic comedy because he was tired of playing the same role. He said no with no backup plan. And he didn’t work for two years. Then came Dallas Buyers Club. Oscar. Reinvention. That’s not ego. That’s heart, guts, and full send.

  • James Dyson made 5,126 prototypes before his vacuum design worked. Imagine failing 5,126 times and still waking up with faith in yourself. That’s not “grindset”—that’s obsession powered by belief. That’s heart over hype.

You know what ties all these stories together?

Not just grit.
Not just smarts.
Heart.

Put Up or Shut Up

So yeah.
If you’re wondering why you haven’t hit your goals yet, ask yourself the real question:

Am I putting my heart into this, or just dipping a toe and hoping the universe hands me a gold medal for trying?

Because that is the line in the sand.

That’s what separates the people who make it from the ones who just daydream about it.

Heart is shown.
It can’t be faked.
And it sure as hell can’t be half-assed.

So put your whole self into it.
The doubt, the fear, the fire—all of it.
Go all in.

That’s how you change your life.

And hey, even if you fail, you’ll fail forward and be better for it.

The next time will be easier with the experience you gained.

And that?
That’s worth everything.

Please like, comment, share and tell me what you think.

Never miss a blog post and follow me here: (1) Tonysbologna | Anthony Robert | Substack

39 thoughts on “The Real Reason You Haven’t Hit Your Goals Yet”

  2. to me it is also like I never want to reach them becuse I never want to have them in ways. IT linkes to lacan and desire – but then I fail to live . I I also love what you wrote – I try to find meaning and heart in my text again – not “grandiosity”.

    Reply

  3. This was so motivational. I’m printing it out so I’ll be reminded of it again and again. Thank you.

    Reply

  4. Yes, now I am going to write the short story that will be accepted to my favourite magazine rather than sending any old thing that was written years ago and not targeted to the market- thanks.

    Reply

  5. Tony, this post was a refreshing slap of reality—like a cold shower, but with better punchlines. I learned a long time ago that hitting goals isn’t about the goal itself—it’s about knocking out the tasks that get you there. I always start with the one I least want to do. Works every time. Thanks for the solid reminder and the laughs that made it go down easier.

    Reply
  7. Pingback: The Real Reason You Haven’t Hit Your Goals Yet – filmy Gyan

  8. Thought-provoking post, Tony. I’m pretty sure I put my heart into it when I started out, but I must have been ‘failing forward’ all this time. Now I’m tired – but I’ll pick myself up and keep on keeping on. More of the same, or maybe a change? Who knows? I’ll see. 🙂

    Reply
  10. Pingback: The Real Reason You Haven’t Hit Your Goals Yet – 1MZS – the magazine

  12. Hm… this held a mirror up to me. I’ve also noticed its relation to a fear of failure. If I try with everything I have and it doesn’t work out, I will have to reassess my capabilities, goals, or both. Recently read The Courage to Be Disliked and there was an example of an aspiring writer who never took positive actions toward his goal, because “he wants to leave the possibility of ‘I can do it if I try’ open, by not committing to anything.” Talk about another line that reaches up and slaps you across the face.

    Great post and good reminder not to give in to the temptation to half-commit. (What even is a half-commitment? Probably an oxymoron)

    Reply

  14. Reminds me of the old-fashioned phrase: Be the best version of yourself. Don’t follow other’s examples but ask yourself what you love to achieve and what you’re willing to do for it. Thanks for sharing this inspiring text!

    Reply
  16. Pingback: The Real Reason You Haven’t Hit Your Goals Yet – TeaTime

  17. Oof! But I do put my heart into it–I do! Maybe my piddly little heart isn’t enough? Fine. I’ll take yours. 😉 Joking, of course. Great post. And you’re right. Both feet. Thanks for the reminder.

    Reply

  18. Well put. I seriously enjoyed reading about why I fail. I fail forward so much I face-plant sometimes. But I honestly think that fear of failure goes hand in hand with fear of success. What do I do if I fail but, more importantly, do I have the energy, talent and stamina to keep going if I succeed? Again, great article!

    Reply

  19. Loved it. I should print it out and tack it to the wall above my desk. Thanks for the reminder, if we want something, “We” need to be the one doing it.

    Reply

  21. All of this is so true!! So many things I wanted to do that I simply couldn’t succeed in because I wasn’t all in. Going at it heart first instead of head first is a great mindset to have. Thanks for sharing!

    Reply

Leave a Reply