Recently, much to my comedic dismay, I was kicked in the nuts.
Yes, kicked in the nads, the balls, the pearls or whatever you and your locker room want to call them.
For those that have never been kicked in the nuts (I’m talking to you females) it is the one act besides proposing that can bring a grown man to his knees. And when that man is on his knees you’ll hear a symphony of swear words that will make the Church choir director cry.
It hurts that bad.
You want to know the crazy part?
The crazy part is I kicked myself in the balls. Well, not physically because you know physics, whatever the Hell that means; but rather mentally.
And it was after the twisting-nauseating pain that soon followed that I was overcome by a blanket of insight that I would like to share with you.
Are your nipples hard yet?
My insight was this: You Are Your Own Worst Enemy
The cat’s out of the bag (not that the cat was ever in there because you know cats and furthermore BAGS) but that’s the secret. You are your own worst enemy.
What’s the reason you’re not working in the field you want to be in? You.
What’s the reason you’re not making the money you want to make? You.
What’s the reason you’re not in the shape you want to be in? You.
What’s the reason you haven’t asked that special someone out? You.
I could go on and on but for the sake of your eyes, my fingers and the overall waning attention span of the room, I won’t.
You must be thinking: Well gee whiz Tony, you just took a massive shit down my throat and didn’t even take me out to dinner – some guy you are.
Relax amigo – there’s a sweet desert of relief somewhere in the next paragraph.
The Bright Side – You Are the Enemy
Here comes the vanilla explosion you’ve been dreaming about – since you are your own worst enemy, by nature you have the ability to control your destiny.
From what I figure, most people just need a good mental kick in the nuts from time to time to realize what path they’re on so they can pull over and make adjustments.
You see life is like yin and yang, you can’t have positive without negative as the forces are intertwined. It’s perfectly balanced like that. You have the power to control your life the moment you decide that you’re responsible for it – it’s quite the liberating feeling honestly.
I want to remind you that you have the power to make a difference; you just have to start. I know I’m just some guy you haven’t met but I hope this year your feet take you where you want to go.
Keep on keepin’ on.
Please comment, share and let me know what you think. Let me know the changes you want for yourself.“
60 thoughts on “You Are Your Own Worst Enemy … Like Really”
Awesome. I’m going to kick myself in my figurative nuts/balls/nads… idk😂 I’m a girl. I think it’s safe to say boobs. It also hurts😭
This article really did make my nipples hard. Keep it up 😉
Hahah looks like you need a new shirt
I like that yin and yang access to the life because everything comes in pair.Good and bad, light and darkness, day and night !
Ain’t that the truth
Aint this the truth! You’d get a big ole Amen from this girl if you were preachin’ it! I recently experienced a coming to my senses moment and while I can’t understand nad kicking (although giving birth is no walk in the park) I do know the pain that comes with failing to grasp the golden rings! (Not that kind of golden rings– get your head out of the gutter). The great news, we get more than one chance to go for it! Looks like you have decided to take the bull by the horns so to speak. GOOD for you! I really wanted to tell you, I enjoy your humor on your blog. Don’t give up on it. You write humor very well and it is not easy to get that across. Something to think about!
Well thank you very much for stopping by! You made me laugh – I can imagine giving birth isn’t a walk in the park. Thanks – yeah I want to make writing my full time gig – one step at a time!
It’s amazing how that ‘enemy’ of yourself is like coming up against a wall of resistance. I have been working with it the past few months and I am amazed at how strong it is once you know what you want and you go for it. It’s a daily battle but the fight is much sweeter than doing what comes easy. And what comes easy is being your own worst enemy. Thanks for stopping by 🙂 Really enjoyed your post. Thank you for sharing.
I enjoyed your post! I struggle with the wall of resistance too – but the struggle makes the victory better.
Wow Mann .. Its been worth the wait. Fantastic article. So motivating and true!! That you managed to keep the satire glued to it is admirable. But keep it up!!!!
Thank you good sir! I do appreciate the support.
Lol talking about ‘support’ on a post about nuts… How fitting..
Hahah it was a total jockstrap comment
Lol you just have me going nuts now.
Tony, I enjoyed the satrical rants especially this one and thank you for browsing my site. As you stated so authentically we are our own worst enemies and life has a karmaic flow of which we experience the good with the bad. When it comes to grabbing the bull by the horns analogies specific to having the power to motivate ourselves to using our potential and become self-actualized the answer is simply until we are fully aware of our self-identities, our insecurities and how we fit in this world to leverage those abilities there will always be individuals stuck at the crossroad of life. Too afraid to grasp life and live it abundantly and way too comfortable laying in the cut hoping the enablers will continue to be there Batman and chase all their discomfort and blues aways. Keep Blogging 🙂 Your Perspective Uncensored, Unapologetic, and Authentic.
Well thank you for the kind words! You’re making me blush! Ha I agree – things do get easier when people understand their self identity. You keep on blogging too – I like it!
Tonio…loved this.. let me know, when you need a new set of ’em balls…so that you continue to write things such as these…
Hahah I’ll keep you on my emergency contact list!
Sure I’m my own worst enemy; but, that way, I always know what my enemy is going to do next. I’m a crafty one…
You’re like James Bond
If James Bond were a fat middle-aged man…. oh wait! Roger Moore!
James Bond: The other years
You’re funny, but you’re wiser. I loved this piece!
Thank you so much- I loved that you said that! It makes me want to keep writing.
Truth spoken clearly but with humor. Thanks. Needed this today. Cheers
I honestly, literally, *punched* myself in the nuts toweling off after a shower once. But I’d prefer to kick myself in the nuts in the manner of which you speak.
Hahah yikes …. you need to be mighty flexible to kick yourself
A little salty for the grandma’s taste :), but a point well made. Thanks for sharing your witty perspective.
Thank you for reading, I really appreciate the grandma giving this a read 😉
“Salty”… Ha! what a great descriptor…
Here’s another grandma weighing in (and thanks for checking in at my blog).
Probably a more serious comment than you expect, but I can tell you from lots of experience that when you’ve NOT been yourself for a long time, it’s hard to recognize the real you. I don’t have a lot of tips for getting back to the real deal, but I know the feeling is sweet and authentic – like breathing fresh air after a long time underground. My best advice? Don’t get too lost being what other people want or expect. The farther away you stray from your real self, the harder it is to get back … thanks again, xoxox
I love the comment and your input! I agree don’t get too lost being what other people expect you to be.
Great post. Love your writing style.
Thanks so much I appreciate hearing that!
Reblogged this on Shandy Speaks.
Such true words. It’s easy to fall into the trap too, of being one’s worst enemy and unfortunately, it can be very hard to get out. I spent a lot of time holding myself back for the sake of others when I realized ‘what are they doing for me in return?’ The answer was very little. I cut them loose and started to live my life for me. One of the better decisions I’ve made.
That’s awesome! Yeah it’s hard to push people away when they’re close but if it’s for the right reasons the results are usually worth it
But basically, you’re suggesting people to have their figurative balls up like a punching bag in a fleek market? 😂
Hahah something like that
Well written and should be a real kick in the nuts to many people. Sometimes people need that kind of kick just to get them moving. Thanks for writing this and posting it. Stan
This is truly beautiful literature hahaha
Thank you so much I appreciate it
Terrific piece, Tony! And came at just the right moment…I’ll spare you the details, but thanks for stopping by What Would Steinbeck Do this morning… Which beach are you on….I’m an Ocean Beach rat in San Diego. As my surfer friends say, stay stoked!
So glad you digged it!
Wise and fun, I really enjoyed that. You’re right of course, and your straight talking certainly left me thinking. I look forward to reading more. Blessings, Harula x
So glad you liked it
I gave the like for the intro. 😉
Thank you – I appreciate that!
Love your style! So much so that I won’t argue over the individual responsibility thing! 🙂
Thank you so much! I really appreciate the kind words
Holy hell, I love the truth–especially delivered with a laugh 🙂
Thanks so much! Commented with a 😊
I really dig your humor with wisdom it is a good combination.
Thank you! I really appreciate it!